Musings of an Englishman who literally quit his life in Devon in mid-2012 to move to Tijuana to love a girl.
They ended up in San Diego where he became a TV anchorman (yes really...), they got married, and now they're living in England together.
Simple as that really.
Follow your heart, who knows where it will lead.

Crazy. Beautiful. Madness.

Tuesday, 30 July 2013

"Superstition ain't the way, no, no, no..."

IF WE were superstitious we’d probably never have agreed to hold such a life-changing event on Friday 13th.
But then again, my grandfather was born on Friday 13th and he was the most amazing person to make an appearance in my life.
So, what better day to get MARRIED.
Yes, enough of the fun and games, it’s time to be all grown-up, and to exchange vows.
That day will be the culmination of a dream. A dream we’ve both been dreaming with our eyes wide open for little over 18 months.
You know the story by now right…?

We met on Myspace and emailed back and forth for seven YEARS before finally meeting and falling in love? We never spoke on the phone before we met on ‘vacation’, never Skyped, never texted… just emailed.
Cue English boy saying goodbye to all his family and friends, quitting his nice life in the UK, and moving to Tijuana - of all places - to be with the beautiful Jacky.
Imagine You’ve Got Mail, but more tacos than Tom Hanks.
As readers of this blog will know I proposed on top of the London Eye last Christmas at the tail-end of Jacky’s first ever visit to Europe.

Diamonds are forever

The idea of me proposing, overlooking the capital of my country, and offering her a ring from her home country, was too priceless a moment to dismiss.
Anyhow within a couple of months of us arriving back into Jacky’s family home in Mexico, I got news that U.S. Immigration were finally going to let me in to accept the job at U-T TV in San Diego.
I had to move to San Diego in April, leaving behind Jacky in Tijuana because - as a Mexican citizen with a tourist visa - she couldn't legally live with me.
So since April we’ve been continuing our cross-border relationship, literally only seeing each other at weekends.
While this might sound like a fairly ‘normal’ situation for some couples whose lives are governed by work, our situation is far from ideal.
To visit me in San Diego, Jacks has had to wait in line at the San Ysidro border for anything up to five hours, in doing so wasting much of a two-day weekend we would have otherwise spent together.
San Ysidro is the busiest border crossing in the world. Fact. And it’s dirty, loud and generally horrible.

The San Ysidro border - dirty, loud, and generally horrible

While Jacks has applied for a special ‘Sentri’ pass to enable her to pass quicker, we’ve decided to push ahead and get married to avoid any more delays and frustration.
That way we can finally live together legally here on this side of the border.
So we’ve booked our date in San Diego as oppose to Tijuana.
Has any one of you ever tried to get married abroad? In a non-English speaking country? Without booking it all through a dedicated wedding agency?
It’s a nightmare.
In fact, it’s worse than a nightmare. And it seems no two people can give you the same answer about how to go about booking everything, and making sure everything is actually legal.
If you Google it, you’ll get literally 101 reasons ‘not’ to marry in Mexico.
Every forum poses as many questions as answers. And they’re mostly from ‘Senor Steve’ in Mexico City.
We initially looked into getting married in Baja California (the northern tip of Mexico), but it quickly became apparent that the stress involved would be too great.
I’m pretty sure that most weddings involving one-half of the couple being a foreigner to Mexico will end in divorce given the hassles presented.
From what we eventually established, to get married in Mexico I would have to:
a). Take a blood test to ensure that I don’t have Aids;
b). Go to a mandatory marriage guidance group – BEFORE the actual wedding;
c). Fly home to the UK to get original ‘official’ documents (Can you imagine asking your mum to source your original birth certificate 35 years after being born?!);
d). Pay for someone (undoubtedly a lawyer) in Mexico to translate the above ‘official’ documents at a stupidly inflated price; and
e). Pay someone else a whole bunch of money to do a handful of things we never really got to the bottom of…
By the time we worked out that we would need to do all of the above and more, just to get married in Mexico, we were ready to put the whole thing on the back burner for a time.
But then, as if by magic, I ended up downtown in the San Diego County Administration Building on a job for U-T TV.

The San Diego County Administration Building

“It’s a sign,” my cameraman said to me glancing up at the wall in the entrance.
And sure enough, it was a ‘sign’. It was a sign to say that the ‘marriages’ department was upstairs.
I popped up, explained that I was a “British guy” with a “Mexican fiancée” who wanted to get married and the response…?
“Why don’t you just do it here…?”
No blood tests, no official documents needed, no translation, and no need to book the divorce hearing at the same time as the wedding.
Job done.
So yes… come rain or shine, (who am I kidding this is California!) we’re getting married on the lawn in front of the ocean on Friday 13th September, 2013.
In six-and-a-half weeks’ time no less.
While of course we’d love to see all our family and friends, we understand that – due to work commitments and money – it’s simply not possible.
But given the unusual nature of our Anglo-Latin relationship, we’re pressing ahead because we simply want to be ‘together’ – without needing to stand in line and show our passport.
Jacky is the reason I'm here after all.
So Friday 13th… Crazy. Beautiful. Madness.

“When you believe in things that you don't understand…
Then you suffer…
Superstition ain't the way, no, no, no…” – Stevie Wonder - Superstition

Twitter: @tristan_nichols

1 comment:

  1. Congrats!!! As a Mexican-America marrying a "guero" I can relate to your situation. We thought we would have a destination wedding and get. Married in Paris! Ha! One quick google search and that stopped everything!