IT took all of five minutes after landing on British soil
for Jacky to ask the question: “So… where can we buy chilis?”
Shit got serious minutes after.
Now, readers of this blog may well comment on the fact that
I/we talk about ‘chili’ a lot. However nothing is more apparent now in our
everyday lives than the apparent lack of heat/spice.
I think I felt the same way when I had my Star Wars toys
taken away from me as a child after bullying my brother.
Somehow the Tesco ‘mixed chilis’ pack just doesn’t cut it.
Sure you can get jalapenos in a tin, but apparently it’s
just not good enough.
And so begins the great chili hunt.
Just days after arriving back in the UK we began trawling
the aisles of high-street supermarkets, corner shops, delicatessens, and even
farmers markets.
While Jacks let out a yelp of glee at finding chilis,
tortillas and other Mexican-related foods at the supermarket, nothing really completely
ticks the box.
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| Joy |
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| Further joy |
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| The look of happiness says it all... |
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| 'Very hot' chilis |
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| Chili powder - check |
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| 'Sweet' tortillas |
The ‘guajillo’ chili – to this day, just over a week after
arriving back in England – still eludes us.
Any ideas anyone?!
On one instance this past week I caught Jacky watching a
YouTube video on how to make a toffee apple… only with tamarindo and chili
rather than toffee.
“Mmmmmm… tacos…” Jacks soon after remarked on seeing a
friend’s Facebook post and them devouring the dish.
Our circumstances may have changed dramatically, however mi
esposa’s love of chili has not.
It’s only when you’ve been away from the UK for a while that
you realize just how different our palates are.
Everything in the UK somehow just tastes sweeter.
Food in the US is incredibly unhealthy, notably for its salt/sugar
content.
Eating a bag of chips (crisps) you need a glass of water to
make it to the bottom.
But here, everything does appear to taste sweeter (which may
well be the reason why Americans think that every Brit has ‘bad teeth’).
The look of pure disgust on Jacky’s face when she bit into
an El Paso tortilla a couple of days ago said it all really.
She even remarked on how sweet Doritos taste. And she’s
right.
Of course some things are always going to be sweet – and
they’re admittedly all the better for it.
You can’t go wrong with a large dollop of jam and clotted
cream on a scone. Right?
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| The controversial cream tea |
However, in the process of preparing a scone and uploading a
picture of the joyous occasion on Facebook, we started somewhat of an age-old
debate about the whole ‘cream or jam first’.
Cornish = jam first.
Devonshire = cream first.
I have to say, controversially, I’m firmly in the ‘cream
first’ camp.
Jacks is still undecided.
Further joy has been evident in re-discovering our love of
crumpets.
Wowzers. If the rest of the world hasn’t cottoned on yet
they’re clearly missing a trick.
Seeing your wife’s face light up at the sight of a freshly
toasted crumpet is something to behold.
And a traditional roast dinner…? I.n.c.r.e.d.i.b.l.e.
It’s the simple things which make life better. And food
makes EVERYTHING better.
Like eating a good Chinese takeaway for instance.
We take it for granted here in the UK but overseas… well,
it’s a different story.
Last year, shortly after first arriving in San Diego, I
Googled the words ‘good Chinese takeaway San Diego’.
Seconds later a few gazillion results were found. The first
on the list… “there are NO good Chinese takeaways in San Diego”.
Fact.
And boy, Google was right.
With such a high density of Asians in San Diego, it’s bizarre
that Chinese food can be SO bad over there.
So yes, food (and the lack of traditional Mexican chili) has
been one of the main talking points and features of our return.
The last few days of our time in California has also been
the topic of much discussion.
The visa application/notice at work etc seemed to be going
so slowly and then – as fate would have it – everything sped up like a runaway
train.
Jacks’ visa arrived in the post, and so began the fervent
last minute ‘goodbyes’ and subsequent packing.
I have to admit that we actually started packing months ago.
At least I did.
When we knew our time was coming to an end in San Diego I
set the wheels in motion for our exit.
And, in the process of doing so, I realized a few further
differences between here and there.
You see if you want to sell something second-hand in the UK
you list it in the back of a newspaper or on a website.
Things generally take a while to sell, and you may never get
a phone call - hence my decision to advertise the things we were selling early.
But I have to tell you, that process in the US is COMPLETELY
different.
Within seconds of advertising bits on the website,
‘Craigslist’, people begin phoning.
They come round and they begin asking about other bits you
have in the apartment – including things that aren’t actually for sale.
And of course, they also generally offer a 100th
of the advertised price.
Still, my naivity of this process caught us out.
Try explaining to your wife where the TV/sofa/stools/TV
cabinet/desk/and kitchen utensils and appliances have gone… two months before
you’re due to move out!
It’s fair to say I wasn’t in the best books for a while…
Still, I stand by my thinking: Clear the apartment so we
know what we have left to take to the UK.
As anyone who’s been in the situation will know, condensing
and collecting an ENTIRE apartment into a few suitcases is not easy –
especially when your wife is Mexican, and she doesn’t know what the climate at
the end destination will actually be like.
Girls really don’t get the concept of packing. Clearly.
At one point I had to remind her: “Um, they do have shops in
the UK…”
Yes, this comment didn’t get my out of the bad books.
Knowing that we were facing a fairly hefty excess baggage
charge, I attempted to ship a few bits back.
Bad idea. Airline excess baggage fees for up to 23kgs =
$100.
One small box containing a couple of books and a picture
frame = $180+.
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| Shipping news |
Go figure.
Someone’s clearly making a lot of money.
So in the end we managed to bag everything up ready for our
departure.
To this day I’m still not sure how we a). acquired so much
stuff in so little time; and b). actually fit all that stuff into our
suitcases.
Two years ago I arrived with a guitar and a bag of T-shirts
and board shorts.
The day we left… five suitcases, a guitar, an iMac, two
additional bags and other bits.
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| Some of our luggage... |
The woman at the check-in desk looked ready to have a fit.
I just gave her my credit card, and then very nearly cried.
And fitting everything in my father’s Volkswagen Golf at the
other end…? I personally think we broke some sort of record with that feat.
So yes, we’re back. And it’s beautiful. And Jacks is clearly
very happy which makes me happy.
Say what you want about the rainfall in the UK but without
it, it wouldn’t look so lovely and green.
Now… where did I leave the brolly ('umbrella' to those outside the UK)?
Twitter: @tristan_nichols
